Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
