I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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