How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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