i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
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Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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