YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
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