Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize