She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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