Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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