I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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