she was so not down for the gang bang
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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