You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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