I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
