i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
