actually, I'm a sock model
I smell stomach acid.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Randomize
