16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
