So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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