the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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