dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
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