He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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