Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Let's get the cat blown out
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
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