My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
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i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
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He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
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