Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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