Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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