I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Bring me that man meat
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
