i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
