just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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