Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
ttyl tear gas
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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