Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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