Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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