no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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