"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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