It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
