It was confusing and full of hummus
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Blow job season was short but glorious.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
