I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
