Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
