Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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