Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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