let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Say something about gay babies.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
