The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
