is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
