Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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