Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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