were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize