I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
