Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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