escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize