Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
You were trust falling into bushes
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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