After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize
