Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
