ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
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