he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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