Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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